Rebecca Eckler is one of Canada's most talked about newspaper columnists, the author of Knocked Up: Confessions of a Hip Mother to Be, which has been translated into nine languages. Also the author of the bestsellers, Wiped!, Toddlers Gone Wild, and Rotten Apple, the first in a YA series. Random thoughts on life in the competitive world of modern mommyhood. Blog will be loved by trendy mothers who still feel, or often feel, that the most important word in "mommee" is ME!

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Important Answers!!

I've been doing ninepounddictator.blogspot.com for a couple months now. It time for a Frequently Asked Question post...


Q. I've sent you comments and you haven't posted them. You only seem to post comments from bloggers who agree with what you write. You should post all comments, shouldn't you?

A. Let me ask my staff. "Hey, everyone! I need your attention for one quick second. Should I post every single comment on ninepounddictator.blogspot.com even the vicious cruel ones sent from stupid people who either need a life, need to get laid, need a hobby, or need to get a JOB?".....OK, I'm back. Staff says 'Yeah, right! You can do anything you want!"

That's because I'm the sole staff here at ninepounddictator.blogspot.com. It's my blog and I can post comments or not post comments, which makes me feel very powerful indeed. Ha ha ha! That's the beauty of only having to answer to me. I do, in fact, post comments which disagree. I do not post comments from people who write things ABOUT me clearly in an attempt to hurt my feelings. Why would I? It's my blog. Deal.

Q. Do you like anonymous commentors?

A. I kind of do. Sometimes anonymous posters just don't have blogger accounts. But, duh, I can tell if the nasty comments are coming from the same computer and that, not only the anonymous posters, but the ones with fake names, are coming from the same computer. Thanks to my staff. Oh, wait. That's me. Bahhhaaaaa...

Q. Why don't you just stick to writing about mothering?

A. Interesting. An annoymous - of course - commentor asked me about this just yesterday. Let me ask my staff. "Hey, everyone! Can I write about whatever I want or do I have to just stick to writing about mothering?"....OK, I'm back. Staff says I can write about whatever I damn well please and if you don't like it, tough." Again, I asked myself, the only staff here at ninepounddictator.com.

Q. I comment on your blog, why don't you comment on mine?

A. Good question. I do check out everyone's blog who comments on mine. I have met some great bloggiefriends, who I try to comment on often and these bloggers know who they are (love you guys!) Even if I don't comment on your blog all the time, I'm still reading it! I may just not have something to contribute. Sometimes it takes me a few days to comment, but I do try my very best!

Q) How does The Dictator feel about being called The Dictator?

A) Another good question. Let me check. "Hey, Rowan! Do you mind mommy calling you The Dictator?" Rowan's answer: "I want bubble gum!" ...I'll take that to mean she doesn't care.

Q) I abolutely hate reading Ninepoundictator.blogspot.com! I've read all your posts and they all make me want to vomit. What do you say about that, bee-yatch?

A) I say the word, "Be-yatch" stopping being cool around the same time The O.C. started to become really boring. I also say, why do you continue to read this blog. I'm not forcing you to! No one is forcing you to! In fact, if you hate it so much, and are still reading it, and sending nasty comments, I say a) get a therapist, b) go on anti-pychotic drugs and...no, those are your only options.

Q) You said you'd blogroll me and post my logo. And it's not up yet. What happened?

A ) Let me talk to my staff...ok, I'm back. The staff here (me) apologizes profusely and says please email it to me again (rebeccaeckler@yahoo.com) and I will put it up. The staff here (me) can be forgettful.

Q) Why do you have spelling mistakes and typos? Don't you re-read your work you idiot?

A) Let me converse with my copy editor...Ok, I'm back. My copy editor has explained, that no, she doesn't really reread her posts before posting, that she sucks at spelling and there will always ALWAYS be at least one spelling mistake and a couple typos in each post. I should really fire her. You're fired! Oh, wait. I can't. There's only me here. You're hired again!

Q) Do you have any favorite mommy bloggers?

A) Yes, I do. I don't want to pick my absloute favorites (2Badladies, Kristen) but if you look at my blogroll, you'll find many bloggers I read at least a couple times a week. And you find any you think the staff here at ninepounddictator.blogspot.com will like, let us - I mean, ME - know! I love finding new mommy bloggers.

20 Comments:

Blogger Rebecca said...

THAT WAS AWESOME!! Found myself nodding all the way thru! You keep doing what you're doing cuz, whether I always agree with you or not (and what fun would it be to always agree?) your blog is enjoyable to read because you say what you think! If someone doesn't like it, they can read something else!

7:27 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You are hilarious. I love this. Good for you for pointing out that it's your blog and you can do what you want. AND that naysayers don't have to read it if they don't like it. These are so obvious and yet some people still don't seem to get it! Keep up the distracting reading so I have something to read on my lunchbreak. And don't tell my boss.

8:25 AM

 
Anonymous Pandy said...

I'm not a mommy, and I'm not really a blogger (I do have one, but only ever use it when I travel to keep in touch with those back home), but I sure do love reading your blogs! It's part of my daily internet routine! Keep it up!
-Pandy

8:48 AM

 
Blogger Bahar said...

ha ha ha :)

That was great! Really funny! I liked the first question.

One time I wrote "in my blogsphere, we have a dictatorship. I will publish only things that I like. Don't like it? too bad!"

9:35 AM

 
Blogger Kristen said...

I don't know if by Kristen you meant me, but regardless- you sure are one of my favorites! I seriously come here every day. I feel like you're one of my kindred spirits LOL. When people post mean comments I seriously want to beat them up- so mean bloggers who want to try to bash on this blog- you have ME to answer to! Watch out- I've got some guns LOL.

Oh and the smoke and a shower thing- I've SOOO DONE IT..LOL.

11:07 AM

 
Blogger Julie Julie Bo Boolie said...

Where did you find such qualified superior and lets face it, goddess-like staff? You must have offered free daycare.... you did didn't you? And coffee??? I'd work for good coffee ;)

11:25 AM

 
Blogger Cindy said...

That was pretty funny.

Ouch! Picking favourites and I wasn't even picked. That's okay, I'll console myself by thinking i was disqualified because I'm not a mommy, so not a mommy blog... (JK)

ps yeah it is so totally my turn to get really drunk (for like the next million times) and I will be taking dvantage of that next week in Calgary. I plan on calling him late at night to wake him up, make him suffer... Should be lots of fun.

11:57 AM

 
Blogger MommyWithAttitude said...

But hey, I'm nice and recently you didn't post one of my comments either. It was just about my own tantrums... I'm sure I didn't call anyone an idiot (except maybe myself). What's up with that?

12:25 PM

 
Blogger Julie said...

Love it! It always amazes me when people expost you to post (or not delete) nasty comments. Bunch of asshats if you ask me.

12:45 PM

 
Blogger Not Jenny said...

Hee hee! I needed a good laugh today!! Blog on, Sistah!

4:01 PM

 
Blogger Heather said...

There are a few reasons I look at your blog daily.

Reason 1. I just love other mommy bloggers.

Reason 2. Controversy.

Reason 3. I appreciate that you post both ends of the spectrum. I don't care how you operate your blog comment wise. I completly understand omiting those posts you find offensive. I would. (I secretly love that one of my comments was omitted..nothing hurtful was intended, though I'm sure you know that)

Reason 4. I like you, but I feel like if I ever met you in person we would not get along. On the other hand, we might really get along. This fascinates me.

Reason 5. I really want to know when you and the fiance are going to get hitched, and how the dictator will let this all happen.

Reason 6. I have found a lot of other interesting blogging women and men out there through the comment section and your blog roll.

I bet you get some seriously insane comments. Even if you don't post them, make sure you ALWAYS laugh about them.

5:40 PM

 
Blogger JennC said...

LMAO.

Wonderful post.

2:45 AM

 
Anonymous CJ said...

Yeah for you, tell it like it is by golly! I do beleive it's your blog, you write what you want, you post comments that you want, and that's that in a nut shell. If they don't like it, tell them to kiss your... blog (or a part of your body, whichever you prefer) ;)

I enjoy reading you, not sure if I've commented or not as I don't look to see. Yeah, I have a life, believe it or not. I think I followed a link over from somewhere to you and have been reading you ever since. You give me a chuckle or a laugh when it's needed most.

We need more laughs and giggles because life shouldn't always be so serious and pathetic, now should it?

4:42 AM

 
Blogger Kristen said...

P.S. guys, but "guns" I mean arm muscles, lol. Not real ones. And even me saying I have arm muscle "guns" is pretty funny. But I figured I'd better clear that up since I'm Italian and all. LOL.

7:13 AM

 
Blogger HomeFireBlue said...

Hell yeah! I am fascinated by annonymous hate-commentors who feel the need to read you all the time then point out how much they think you suck.

They're like that bad accident on the motorway that you can't stop yourself slowing down to gawp at.

Your blog, your rules. They can get stuffed.

-Blue

10:41 AM

 
Blogger Christina said...

Love it. I like reading your blog because you're flat out honest and real. Like many of the other blogs I like to read, you don't paint motherhood as bluebirds and crisp white linen dresses.

And I will never understand why people choose to read and comment on blogs they don't like. If you don't like it, don't read it people! No one is forcing you to read it!

Keep up the good work. And maybe give that staff a rasie.

10:44 AM

 
Blogger Her Bad Mother said...

Give your staff a raise!

And - what Christina said. You're just being you, and that's what makes your blog refreshing to read.

10:35 AM

 
Blogger Jenn said...

Lovely! Why do these Anon people post at all? I just don't get it.
I like the power of my blog too - If only there was a handy dandy DELETE button in real life. "Are you sure you want to delete this person? This action cannot be undone. This person will never be able to cut you off in traffic again."
Buh-BYE. Ah dreams.

3:38 PM

 
Blogger Helen said...

Love it!
SO true - your blog - your world - we only have to read it if we want.
I keep coming back because I enjoy it, not because you forced me to.
Keep it up!

3:12 PM

 
Blogger little miss sunshine said...

I hate when people are so concerned about spelling and grammar and all that stuff....get a real issue people!

11:55 AM

 

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