Undercover Mom

I'm about to go off and spy on The Dictator at camp - for the second time.

It's very uncomfortable. For me, for the counselors, for everyone.

Every morning at camp, swim time happens between 11 and 11:30 a.m.

So I will go upstairs, where there is a viewing area to the pool below, behind a large glass window.

So, I guess it's not *really* spying. I mean, it is a viewing window. You are supposed to *view* from it.

The first time I dropped The Dictator off at camp I realized I would have to learn to turn a blind eye. The Dictator has had one-on-one attention since the day she was born.

Nanny Mimi has really been at her beck and call, since the day I brought her home from the hospital. So when I dropped her off at camp, where the ratio is about four 2-3 year-olds for every counselor, I knew this would be different.

My friend also dropped her son off at the same camp with me one day. Her son too, has had one-on-one attention from a nanny, from the day he was born.

As we watched our little darlings climb a swing set, with no one really paying attention, after we dropped them off, I grabbed her arm and said, "We have to go."

"I would never have let him climb that thing alone," she said.

"We have to turn a blind eye. Let's go before we start to cry," I answered.

To a certain extent, I do believe children need their independence and need to learn how to hang like monkeys from swing sets. If they fall, they fall. They're kids.

I needed to learn, so did Nanny Mimi, that we had to let go of The Dictator to a certain extent. Sigh.

Nanny Mimi watches The Dictator swim every single day. I think this is wrong.

Because, I know, from the last time I joined Nanny Mimi at the viewing window, that the counselors started to pay way more attention to The Dictator, once The Dictator saw us and started waving at us.

The counselors were constantly looking up at us watching them. I was pathetic. Every time one of them saw me, literally, I ducked.

I don't necessarily want The Dictator to get special attention, just because Nanny Mimi is watching her every day. Then again, why shouldn't Nanny Mimi watch her to make sure she's having fun and is, um, as safe as can possibly be.

It's her job to make sure my child is alive and also happy.

"Why aren't they giving her The Noodle to hang off of," Nanny Mimi was screaming, when I stood next to her, watching The Dictator in swim. "She likes the Noodle. She likes the Noodle. Come on Guys!!! Give her a Noodle! Why aren't they giving her a noodle."

Of course, the counselors couldn't hear her. (The Noodle is one of those long tube-like things that float in pools. Also called Pool Penises. Or maybe that's just what I call them. Anyway.)

I knew at that moment that I had the best nanny in the world, one who cared about my child as much as I did. And Nanny Mimi has one thing that I don't have. Which is, she doesn't give a crap if the counselors see her spying.

I did. And I do. I can only imagine what they think, which is probably something like, "Rowan's mommy is so annoying. Doesn't she have anything better to do than to spy?"

But, still, I will go spy today because, really, I just like watching The Dictator swim. I mean, the gal now jumps off the side of the ledge (wearing a life jacket) and she can even swim without The Noodle now. (With a life jacket.)

The point is, you can call it spying. I'll call it being a proud parent, with a side benefit of letting other people who take care of my child know that I am watching. Bahahaha.

You say tomato, I say tomato.