Low Frequency People...

My friend refers to these people as low-frequency people.

But, mostly, it's about low-frequency feelings.

About three months ago, or maybe four now, I made my twice yearly phone call to an ex boyfriend from high school (Or did we last until year one University?)

Honestly, it was the one relationship that ended well. I swear.

I only have nice thoughts about this young...oh wait...we're not so young anymore...man. But I do only have nice thoughts. He was funny, kind, cute and he was my first...Ok, this is a family blog. We really just grew apart. Or did he move to Vancouver? In any case, he was my first real love.

Whatever the case, we've kept in touch, about two or three times a year since the break up. We've been broken up now for, um, 13 years. In fact, there are some years that we hadn't spoken at all since the breakup. But then I'll pick up the phone, or he'll e-mail, and we'll have a nice chat and it's all very nice. See, I kind of like the dude. For someone I talk to twice a year.

Last time we spoke, he told me he was getting married. And I was like, um, WHAT?????

I also thought, "Well, I got engaged first, and I had a baby first and nananana-boo-boo!"

But it brought up these "low frequency" feelings. No, it's not jealousy. It's not that I have feelings for this dude. It's been 13 years! Maybe 10 per cent of it is that he's supposed to be pining for me forever. But I don't even think that's it. (After all, I did get engaged first and had a baby first, nananana-boo-boo.)

I think mostly it's a big reminder of time gone by or something, kind of like looking at your junior high year book and reading what your best friend wrote to you and you're like, "Stacy? Who's that? I don't remember being best friends with a Stacy."

Or maybe, because he was my first true love, I feel protective of him. Which is ridiculous. Or maybe it's the same feeling you get when you break up with someone and they get married before you, and have a baby before you (And, you know, that sucks) but not exactly the same because I got engaged first and had a baby first and nanana-boo-boo.

I was happy for him...And I was also...Well, I had low-frequency feelings.

Anyway, I just left him a message, "Hey. It's me. I think you got married two or three months ago. Call me. I want to know the dets."

I guess what it really means is that we're over. But I got engaged first and had the ba - ok, you get the point.