I've Been Dumped!
And didn't even know it!
I almost spit up my Special K this morning, when I picked up the Calgary Herald, and saw my named mentioned.
I've been eating Special K, because, apparently, if you eat Special K two meals a day, you'll lose a waist size in like two weeks.
Of course, that would mean I'd need to eat Special K two meals a day, which means I'd have to pack up a bowl, spoon, milk, and my Special K, and bring to the office, which ain't gonna happen. Maybe it will.
Anyway, back to being dumped.
A plug on the front page of the paper caught my attention. It was about friendships between mothers and non-mothers, and how having a baby ruins friendships if your friends have babies and you don't.
So I opened to the Real Life section to read the story, a topic which I find very interesting. I could not give a crap about politics in this province, because it is what it is, but friendships and mothering? Well, of course I'm going to read it.
I almost spit up my Special K when I got to the paragraph where the writer mentioned my name and how she broke up with me when I started writing about Baby Rowan and doing my Mommy Blogger gig in the Globe and Mail.
The writer didn't think we had anything in common anymore because I had Baby Rowan.
It was a really interesting story. The writer mentioned how her friend was pregnant and already there was talk about babies and how she worried her friendship would change. And the writer interviewed a bunch of non-mothers who moaned about changing friendships.
Anyway, first off, I'd like to say, while I love talking about my child, I don't only talk about my child. I also talk about other things, like, um, my Special K diet and why my body has, still after three years, not gone back to the way it was pre-baby.
I also still am obsessed with fashion. I can talk to you about my new Prada winter coat (Which I absolutely needed as it is minus 30 in this city today, and it was a fashion emergency. At least that's what I'm telling myself....It is one warm fucking coat, that's for sure.)
I can talk about my new obsession with Grey's Anatomy, a show I recently got into, so bought the first two seasons on DVD and watched all 32 episodes in a week. I'm in love, along with 23 million other people - not all of whom are mothers - with Dr. McDreamy.
The point is, I can talk about all the mindless things I talked about pre-mother. And they are completely mindless things, which, mind you, I still like to talk about.
I liked the story, even if I was dumped so publicly, without any warning, with someone I didn't even know I had a relationship with!
Here's the truth. The writer is right. Some of your friendships will change. I had this one really good friend and we stopped talking when I got pregnant. I was super busy. She was super busy. Blah blah blah.
She called when The Dictator was born. And I kind of yelled at her. It probably was the hormones, but I was kind of pissed too. I spoke my mind, which was something about her not calling me for the nine months I was pregnant.
Flash forward to today, and now we talk all the time. She now has a baby. But that's not the only reason. Friendships are always changing. Sometimes you grow apart. But true friendships last - even after breaks. I'm glad this one did.
Here's another truth. Friendships changing has more to do with aging, then it has to do with having kids. I think, even if I didn't have The Dictator, my friendships would have changed. People are busy with their own lives. People's interests change.
Yes, you have less free time when you have a baby, but I can't imagine that I would now live the life I led when I was in my twenties, now that I'm in my thirties. I mean, who the hell wants to be out at a bar every night? Certainly not me. And that has nothing to do with The Dictator. That's me.
Not that I ever liked to stay out past midnight, but now I rather curl up at home with Dr. McDreamy, then leave my house at 11 p.m. to head to a crowded bar in a tank-top in winter.
I don't really think I'm that different. Sure, I went to two birthday parties for three year olds yesterday and I'm worried about The Dictator who has a cough and I love her so much it hurts.
But I can also talk to you about my Special K diet...If there's a chance I can win you back.